BEING NICE IS STUPID

i did the unthinkable, i became nice, but it didn’t last long so don’t worry. i was nice and because of that the douchebags that i had to deal with thought that they could walk all over me, but bobby doesn’t let that shit happen.

what?

basically, i was in a car accident, vehicle was damaged beyond repair, i went to purchase a new vehicle because it is fucking cold here and really hard to cart two little fuckers around, dealership won’t give me my new vehicle until lien is removed from financing company, finance company won’t remove lien until manitoba public insurance settles with them.

so what the fuck am i supposed to do? i have been without a vehicle for a month now. forget the fact that its freezing, forget that i have two kids under the age of two. i am self employed! i have had to postpone meetings and make new arrangements with clients. this is costing me money.

i was annoyed on monday. i called the finance company, i was calm and extremely polite, i wanted to kick my own ass. left a message, no call back. getting angrier. i call manitoba public insurance to see if i could get some extra compassionate care and a rental car while they dispute with the finance company. left a message. nobody calls me back. just a little bit more angrier. an hour passes. i leave more messages. and another. and another.

ring!

finance company calls me back. they blame manitoba public insurance for the delay. i am annoyed and i know this is a cop out. i try really hard to be polite, but there is no empathy and no ownership on their part. i finally lose it. i don’t give a fuck at who is to blame, bottom line is i don’t have a vehicle and you fucking bastards are not doing anything to help.

maybe you should call manitoba public insurance and get a rental.

sounds reasonable, after all i pay insurance for shit like this. leave another message. finally get a call back and am promptly informed that they were doing me a courtesy by calling me back. what the fuck? i am told that they will not give me a vehicle because they sent a settlement to the finance company. but wait a minute, i still have no fucking vehicle. they blame the finance company.

so what’s a motherfucker to do?

dealership called me told me that my vehicle is still on their lot. thats great i love having a vehicle i can’t drive. no one is returning my calls anymore. i am just getting more pissed as the time passes. i am now calling them every 15 minutes and leaving messages like “are you done yet, call me.” my wife is calling them every 15 minutes asking the same thing. anthony calls every 15 minutes, but i have him saying “i’m cold, where’s my fucking car? call me.”

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chuck d

chuck-d.jpg

don’t believe the hype people. ummm, i am starting an illustration blog check it out here.

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HOW I PLAN ON GETTING SHIT DONE

man i suck at getting things done. really really suck. if there is something else that i could be doing instead of being productive you can guarantee that i will be doing that. so i have decided to simplify my life a bit so that i don’t have so much shit to fuck up my focus.

emails

i am addicted to checking my emails so i’m turning it off. i will only be checking my emails from now on once a day in the evening. i will give myself an hour to process and respond to emails. if i don’t get that shit done then it will have to wait until tomorrow.

blogging

i am going to take a couple of hours a day to read, comment, and maybe write on others blogs and my own. i may end up cutting this down to a couple hours a week. i’m not hating on my blogger brothaz and sistaz, just gotta pay the bills.

phone calls

don’t call me! you will get my voicemail which i’ll check a couple of times a day, just in case there is a legitimate emergency. i am also considering getting a 1-800 to accommodate international clients, but that too will go to voicemail.

paper

naomi is talking about it on her blog, anywired is writing about and now me. i am ditching all my electronic calendars and to do lists. i have one of those old timey calendars and a small notepad for other things. i will also be viewing my porn on paper from now on.

audiobooks

i used to read a lot, but don’t as much now. i can feel myself getting stupider. so i am loading my ipod with audiobooks so that i can listen to them while i workout. the best part is i can delete the book if it sucks and not set it on fire like i used to.

outsourcing

i like designing, but there is a lot of stuff that needs to be done sometimes that is repetitive, or that i just don’t like doing (coding, color correction, blah, blah, blah). so i am going to outsource this stuff, actually i am going to see how much i can outsource before my design suffers. i figure that i could spend my own time making more money.

batching

there is a lot of repetitive and redundant shit that i do each and everyday. what i am going to do is combine these and hopefully spend less time on them. so if i am checking my email i might also check my rss feeds at the same time, that way i am in that reading mood and won’t have to switch gears.

so those are some ideas i have. i am sure that there will be other things that i will be able to do in order to become more productive, but that will have to wait for a different post. if you have any suggestions let me know. if you don’t have any ideas, but want to be the awesomest of my already awesome readers you should totally  subscribe.

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BLOGGING FOR THE FUCK OF IT – STATS

i blog because i like to. i really don’t have any other reason. i don’t make any money from this. it is my way to stay sane while i work from home. all you motherfuckers who visit this site are like my co-workers and this is the water cooler. i love to hear about what is going on in your lives, if i didn’t have this, i don’t know how long i would be able to continue working from home.

i know that i have neglected my little baby this past month, but all that is going to change. i am making a promise to all of you that i will post something everyday, even the weekend. just like i make time for working out, my fam, and my clients, i have decided to make time for all my new online brothaz. if i don’t fulfill my commitment call me out, shane does this.

statz

so since it’s the end of the month i decided that i would post some stats for the month of january and set some goals for the upcoming month.

subscribers: 6. please don’t laugh i may act tough, but i am really sensitive. the goal is to double this number for the month of february. thanks to all that have subscribed and those that haven’t, what the fuck you waiting for?

posts: 4. sorry about that and thanks to all those who are still hanging around. i will post at least 28 times in february.

blog views: 240. i said don’t laugh. the goal is to get 1000 views for the upcoming month which i think is definately doable, i’m already at 60.

top 3 posts:

1) it hurts to write this

2) 5 ways to keep that shitty job

3) shane and peter are my homeboyz

top commenter: Jarkko, so that makes him my bestest friend, the yin to my yang.

non-blog related goals

this month i will concetrate on getting new clients. i will do this through refferals, job boards, networking, and the dreaded cold call. i need to start reading more for leisure so i will read 4 books this month (any suggestions?), it’s a start. i will be exploring ways that i can eliminate redundancies, eliminate time wasters and outsource aspect of my freelance in an attempt to free up more time and make more money.

there you have it, i put it all out for everyone to see so that you peeps can help, encourage, and trash talk. oh by the way, i noticed that a lot of you haven’t subscribed…so you should probably get on that.

PEACE!

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HOW I BECAME RICH

cheddah.jpg

is that a digg worthy headline or what, by the way fuck digg, i don’t need you, i think. this title might be a little misleading because although i feel like i am rich, my bank account definately does not reflect this. being rich does not require having millions of dollars…let me say that again because even i am having a hard time believing it, being rich does not require a lot of money.

i’m rich, bitch

i guess dave chapelle said it best. i’m rich bitch. today i woke up at 9:30 am (i normally wake up at 6am, but for purely selfish reasons), got the kids ready, then went swimming with the family all afternoon, we then went out for a late lunch with friends, and then i went to the gym for a workout. at the gym i could hear people talking about their shitty day at work and how much they hate their jobs (not everyone was complaining). at that moment i realized that i was really lucky, i have decided to live a lifestyle that allows me to enjoy the really important things in life.

what makes me rich

time: i own my time. i don’t have a boss that tells me to come in from 9 to 5. because of this i can work at anytime of the day and actually schedule work around my family and not the other way around. you can always make more money, but time is a limited resource.

location: i don’t have an office. i am not stuck at a certain location, granted i do most of my work from home, but come summer i can work from the lake house (the inlaws, not mine, i may be rich but i have no money). my wife and i have discussed relocating to the south pacific for next winter, we can’t stand this fucking cold.

career: maybe this should be lack of career. i don’t feel that what i do is a career, this is freelance. i don’t have a boss, i have clients that i work with. it’s a partnership, they may be paying me, but they don’t own me. as a graphic designer all i need is my macbook and my creativity.

family: this is not only the reason why i do it, it is also the reason why i am able to do it. having two young ones is motivation, they need food, clothes, comfort and shelter and if you’re a parent your probably like me, you would rather die then see your kids go without. my wife, i have said it many, many times, but it is so important, she is my biggest fan. she won’t let me fail.

possesions: i put this at the bottom of the list because i truly feel that it is the least important, but still important. what good is working if you can’t reward yourself occasionally? you don’t need the mercedes in the driveway (but you can if you want) you don’t need that million dollar mansion (but you could if you want), but you can have pretty things if you make sacrifices, research and don’t give in to impulses.

the end

so there you have it, this is why i’m rich. what makes you rich (besides tha cheddah)?

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shane made me do it

michael brito

shane called me out, go here to find out more.

i am brutally honest

you would think that this would get me in a lot of fucking trouble, but it hasn”t. because of my honesty people tend to be draw to me. i don’t say shit to be hurtful or petty, i just say what is on my mind. a friend of mine once said, “i love you brito, you don’t care that you’re an asshole.” fine i’m an asshole, but i’m just saying the shit that others won’t and you’re welcome.

i hide shit

i can’t stand mess, it is probably my number 2 pet peeve. i also hate cleaning so what’s a motherfucker (michelle is a mother so technically…) to do? i hide it. if you come over don’t look under any of the beds, don’t open any drawers, don’t look under the couch, and for godsake please don’t go into the basement. this annoys my wife, but what you gonna do.

i am an attention whore

i’m the guy at the party that has the group of peeps around him usually laughing sometimes commenting about how much of a jerk i am. i can’t help it. weird thing is that i have only developed this within the last 4 years. before that i was pretty introverted. i guess i am overcompensating.

i judge books by their covers

by books i actually mean you. first impressions are huge for me. if we are meeting for the first time and you look like a peice of shit i will not take you serious. you may be a great person, but if you don’t take the time to take care of yourself we can’t hang out. this brings me to my next point.

i am competitive

i believe that competition breeds success. that is why i surround myself with people that are better then me. if i want to get in the best shape possible i don’t go hang out with a 300 lbs motherfucker. i hangout with a worldclass athlete. i don’t do this to learn from them, fuck that, i do this because i want to compete against them and beat them.

i am never late

my number one pet peeve is people who are late for meetings/or gatherings or being late myself. i find it extremely disrespectful. after having kids i have found myself cutting it close a couple times, but i rather not show up then to show up late.

i hate kids

not my own though. they may piss me off sometimes, but i couldn’t imagine my life without them. i hate everyone elses kids. i thought that once i had my own i would learn to like those other little fuckers, but i actually think i hate them more. i see how much better my kids are than the others and think to myself why can’t they be more like mine.

bonus

i may be hard to swallow sometimes, but i do care about people. if you are a friend of mine you know i have your back. if i consider you family i will take care of you. i just recently sold one of my duplexes because i am finding it really hard to be a landlord. i should be concerned about turning a profit, but i am too busy making sure that my tenants are happy. BUT, don’t cross me, i expect the same respect and if i feel that i am being used i will cut you.

PEACE!

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IT HURTS TO WRITE THIS

2006 hyundai tucsonso i am back again. i bet you all have written me off as some blogger hack who can’t cut the mustard (cut the mustard? is that a saying?), but you would be wrong…again. so now you are probably feeling pretty bad for doubting me, but i forgive you, you are only human and humans make mistakes. so let me tell you what happened to me and why i haven’t been participating in this online community.

january 15th, 2008 – michelle (my wife) was going to teach a private swimming lesson and i thought it would be a great idea to take anthony (he loves swimming, i hate swimming, it’s just so pointless). so we get ready, get anthony really excited and we’re on our way. fucking eh!the swimming pool is a 5 minute drive from my home, but we had to pick up michelle’s student so we would take about 10 minutes. so on the way to michelle’s student (we will call her from now on no swim) we get into a pretty bad car accident. we are little banged up, but not badly hurt, anthony didn’t even cry.

so what happened?

a moron decided to go through an intersection without looking. i hit her passenger side door at about 50 km/hour, pushed her car up onto a snow bank and a tree. i was in shock. what the fuck happened. i have never been in a accident and was experiencing a number of emotions. i was worried about michelle and anthony. i was angry that this stupid cunt (yeah i said it) endangered the life of my wife and child. i was concerned about my vehicle, it being a newer car and me still owing more then it has depreciated, i was concerned that if it was to get written off (and it definitely was going to be written off) that i would have to owe a residual amount that insurance would not cover.

conclusion

so the point is i have not been able to write because i banged up my wrist and the therapist told to take it easy, which has been incredibly hard for me to do (no playing, no drawing, no weightlifting).

my wife is a little worse off then me. she is suffering from back pains, shoulder pains, leg pains, and neck pains. she is still functional (she’s kinda this tough chick), but i am finding myself helping out a lot more then before. i guess thats good, but i still have to make a living and seriously these kids drive me crazy.

anthony is fine, he hasn’t complained once about aches or pains. he is just upset that he didn’t get to go swimming, he still talks about it. he did get a bad cold and cough after the accident, but i don’t think it’s related.

isabelle is good. she was visiting her grandma so she wasn’t with us.my car was written off.

so now i’m car-less. can’t get a new one because michelle is on maternity and i am self employed. since i have only been self employed for a couple months i don’t have an accurate record of income. michelle and i have gone without vehicle before, but we are finding it extremely hard to get around now with two small children, especially in -40 degrees celsius weather (actually today it is -50 degrees celsius, my dog doesn’t even want to go outside).

nothing else to do but get on with life. shit happens. i understand this. i know things will get better, but that doesn’t mean i can’t still be pissed about it. the morale of this story is don’t be a fucking moron, your stupid, idiotic decisions don’t just affect you. it’s like throwing a rock in a lake, even the smallest rock will make ripples.

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